Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Long Lost Friend ... Adios "A"

I'm usually not one those girls who vents about others but the past few months I have felt very hurt by a "friend".  I know she does not read this or has any idea that I am attempting to blog but here I go.

 I started college in fall 2002. Wow, that's almost ten years! I met my best friend; lets call her "A" in the fall of 2003 through some of my very good guy friends. Some of these guys I have know since we were in middle school. Me and A grew very close over the next few weeks and or months in my second year of college. A was my partner in crime for the next 3-4 years. We went to the football games, the bar, dinners, lunches, cried with each others because of broken hearts and deaths of close friends and family members. A and I did everything together most people knew us as trick and frat more or less.  During that last year in college I knew that her and I were drifting apart. I had found a new group of friends, she began acting strange and starting par-taking into different that I was not into. Yes if your doing your math right I was in college for six years. But I did major and have two minors! I really didn't know what I wanted to do. So graduation came and both of our parents through us a wonderful graduation party and we hung out that last summer of '08. We both moved and went on our own way after August 2008.  So our post college life started. It was very strange five years we lived with in 5 miles from each other and now were 4 hours apart. We would try and catch up and football games in the fall and then when we were both in the coastal Georgia area. After a year or so of playing the catch up game i got into my car and went home and thought to myself, why do we even do this to ourselves. It was all a fake showing every time we met up with each other.

 In the fall of 2009 I bought a house and got a new job and to be honest I never thought about sharing any of that information with her. I don't think that she had any idea that I had moved or finally found Job that I loved and house that I am proud to show off to people. When her and I ran into each other in November of 2009 it seamed like she couldn't of cared less about what was happening in my life. Once again I made my venture back and spoke to another friend of mine and told here was over A and really didn't care if we spoke again. I think it was the summer of 2009 and I heard a rumor that she was finally happy and was in a great relationship and maybe finally in my own words "grew up and finally left college".  I am sure that sounds a lot worse then it does but whatever, I guess I am just a little bitter.  For what I understand she introduced him to all of our friends from school and to my own brother, but this time I was never called or once tried to make a date to meet him. Well guess what, that relationship did not work out (which I was not surprised at all) I guess that they dated for a year to year and a half. And guess who was the first person she called.... Me.   I feel bad that I never called her back. I thought about calling back that day or hell even a few weeks later but I never did. Thinking about it makes me feel bad that I never tried to make sure that she was all right but I do not think she would call me if she heard bad news about me.  In 2011 I ran into her with my friend Kelly and my tailgating group. And even Cara (who has known A and I since we became friends. She was the one that introduced me to A) said that she knew something was not right when she saw us together. And while I was talking to Cara on my way back to Milledgeville I told her I was done. I don't see A and I being friends again.

So what brought back all of this to the service a friend of mine was telling me she was going to be moving back to Atlanta. Yes, I have heard that before. She told our friends and me that before in 2009 and it never happened. It just blew my mind that my friend knew A was coming back to Atlanta.

I guess what I am trying to get at is that it looks like I lost my BFF from college A.  Most people who do know me, know that I do not "lose" friends, the ones that I let into my world usually stay for life. I always thought that her and I would be still together as BFF. That if I ever got married she would be standing next to me as a bridesmaid or her and Ellen planning a bachelorette party for me. But I guess that will never happen. It is just good to know that I have a wonderful core group of friends that I can count on then when I need them any time of the day. If it wasn't for them and my BF Bryan the past month would of been one of the hardest in my life. I love how they all contacting me in some way to make sure I was all right when I was in Chicago for my Boppas funeral. It just goes to show you that some people will always be in your life and those that put forth the effort they will stay there forever.... Unlike A.

And that is my rant for the year.

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